I hate that feeling of helplessness when your child is sick. I mean, I consistently feel that way bc of Grayson, but when we add another sick kid to the mix it makes for daunting days. Triston has been so chill, so cooperative, so 'not feeling well'. It started with a vomiting, then nothing at all, then fever then diarrhea. Poor kid. He looks drained at moments in the day and others he is running around here like nothing. The only indicator that he is not well is them mask he wears for Grayson's protection.
I REALLY hope he is better for Wednesday-his birthday. I cannot believe is going to be 5. Where did it all go?!
My big boy that I cuddle up with like he was a baby when he is sick. He has asked every night to sleep with me. An extreme mama' boy when sick. And I am ok with that. I want to fix him, make it right and wish it all away.
I am not sure if they were fever-induced nightmares but he woke several times crying the past few days. Clinging to me tighter and tighter as he muffled through the dream. I saw his body twitch, toss and turn. And then finally the sit up with wide, wet eyes searching for me even though I was right beside him. Each one a different version of the same thought, fear, anxiety-me leaving him. He was able to describe each one. Telling me I was leaving the house without him to shop at Jewel or wherever I was off to. It broke my heart. I just kept repeating that I was here with him. That whenever I leave the house he will know, I will tell him everytime. What else could I do. It hurt. I was a fool to think that any anxieties he faces would be on pause while I am home on our "off week". But I am glad I was there to talk him through it. No matter what -it still hurts to watch.
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